What is the first emotion you feel when the last day of the school year ends? Relief? Joy? Guilt? Gratitude? Euphoria? Regret? Some combination of these?

There is nothing like a long needed rest. If no one else is around to congratulate, encourage, or commend your accomplishment in teaching this past year, I officially am here for that purpose. Teaching our own children is one of the most arduous tasks in the world. Practically no one understands this or acknowledges it. I do.

It takes not only knowledge and organization to oversee the education of children, but takes a tremendous amount of emotional stability and physical stamina. It takes a toll on us. That toll is cumulative. Most of us, nearly every week, are tempted to throw in the towel and give up. Discouragement is a villain always poking at us and whispering “it’s no good, just quit”.

May I suggest that your resisting that lie is one of the greatest lessons you have taught your children this year? Because, learning is work. Even your silliest or most laid-back child, feels the strain. And, they see it on your face, hear it in your voice. They know it’s hard for you too.

But you have made it—whether excellently or far less than perfectly. This year’s school toil is done. It’s time to rest, rest from that daily effort. “A change is as good as a break,” means that even with all the summer fun and even hecticness, the break from routine will provide rest. The pace of the days alters and the strain lifts. Everyone needs to be refreshed.

Make the most of this time. I have been exploring aspects of time in our lives this year with you, so let’s think about rest time. Rest means no timetable, no deadline, no pressure to perform. It means the usual work is set aside. A change in work is a break. There is still plenty of work to be done—gardening, running children to swimming lessons, and no doubt perhaps more than the usual mountain of laundry as children live outside and revel in dirt. There are still children to be guided. Have you already heard the predictable refrain, “What are we doing today?” “What’s next?” “Where are we going now?”

Let us learn from our children and also be expectant. We can ask these same questions of our heavenly Father. He has ideas for your restful season also. This pause in the academic year is part of the rhythm of our lives, the time that will give energy and zest for the next season.

I know you need no prompting about ways to fill up your days. There are undoubtedly long lists of house projects, creative pursuits, or books you intend to read. Throwing yourself into things you normally have no time for will refresh you tremendously and give you back your old enthusiasm for the next year.

Friends, I am facing my forty-fifth wedding anniversary, and this very evening my last child is graduating from high school. I have been a parent for a longer than usual season, have taught for a little longer than most, and as I reflect, I wonder if you would consider filling that time with some things you have not had time to focus on. These are things that summer break is ideal for instituting or shoring up. They are lessons I did not learn so well that time has allowed me to develop, a little wisdom from a friend who has traveled a little further down the road and wishes you to follow a little more faithfully and peacefully than I have. You, as your children do in school, will have to give full attention and make deliberate effort, but I promise these things will bring more rest even in your busiest seasons.

There is a day ahead you cannot see when you’re in the midst of the hubbub of growing children, coming toward you around the corner, and now is the day to prepare. In the end, it is taking time for relationships that makes the difference. I could write a book on each of the following recommendations, but will keep them intensely succinct—because I know that if you have taken a moment to read this, that moment is probably almost spent.

These are habits. Habits take repetition over time, as you know. Emily has shared with you the habits she works on in the weeks before school starts so they come naturally when it does. I am encouraging you to form some habits for yourself that will make a huge difference in the coming year if you form them this summer.

1. Learn to take time to be still. Literally. Whether it is a minute or 30 minutes, withdraw from the noise, demands,  and activity and come to a full stop. Rest. Stop worrying, and planning and just be quiet. If Susanna Wesley, mother of 19 children could foster this discipline, so can you. It is not a luxury, it is a necessity. Amid the multitudes, Jesus did so. There are too many reasons for stillness than I could list, but your whole person needs to take a time out from the day. The most valuable reason is that you need to listen instead of  continuing in your normal mode of talking, moving, making. There is nothing to fear about quiet, though with the overcrowded days we live you might think so. It is a pause to remember that you are not God and the world is not you. It is a necessary step in the dance of our days to keep you in balance for all days.

2. Learn to spend a regular time with your heavenly Father. This is the most important relationship in your life and, like any other, takes time and cultivation. He speaks through the Bible. He is waiting for you to be alone with him. I know the battle of maintaining this habit with babies and little ones, but if you can manage to make a meal or brush your teeth, you can do this. Getting up with an alarm is only painful for the first seven days. The reward of remembering how much you are loved by your Almighty Father and how much he desires your presence is priceless. Whether two minutes or twenty, this is the most valuable thing you can do in your life. Make the habit in the quiet of early summer mornings and keep it up when school begins.

3. Learn to take time for your husband. I grieve over the number of moms who write to me with marriages in shambles because they are trying to have a perfect Charlotte Mason homeschool experience for their children. You would have no children without him. Your relationship with him is critical to the survival of your family. Every single day, take time for him. Listen, make eye contact, focus on something that would please him. Relationships do not thrive where they are not tended. He is waiting to be alone with you. Summer is a great time to develop the habit of full-attention on your life partner.

It’s a short list. These are simple habits. They are more important than anything else you are thinking of doing at this moment in time.